Happ Will Pitch; Fans Will Gobble Up No-Doze

Bust out the No-Doze folks; tonight’s 10:07pm start time will be a real challenge for us East-Coasters with jobs to get up for on Monday.  But the good news is, JA Happ will start the game instead of Pedro Martinez since yesterday’s game was postponed due to bad weather.  Happ has gotten an extra day to rest and recover from being hit just below the knee with a line drive in Game 2.  He only faced that one batter so should be fresh and ready to go tonight.PA040202.jpg

Not that Martinez was a bad idea, but his recent neck/shoulder injury and the fact that he has not pitched a full game in a month were factors in the decision.  Plus, Happ is a lefty and the Rockies have struggled against left-handed pitching.  Happ has also been the most consistent starter for the Phillies all year long.  In fact, if you look at the numbers, there is no doubt:

W

L

ERA

G

GS

CG

SHO

IP

H

R

ER

HR

BB

SO

J Happ

12

4

2.93

35

23

3

2

166

149

55

54

20

56

119

C Lee

7

4

3.39

12

12

3

1

79.2

80

35

30

7

10

74

P Martinez

5

1

3.63

9

9

0

0

44.2

48

18

18

7

8

37Bottom of Form

J Blanton

12

8

4.05

31

31

0

0

195

198

89

88

30

59

163

C Hamels

10

11

4.32

32

32

2

2

193

206

95

93

24

43

168

 

Happ has the best W-L record, the best ERA and is tied for the most complete games and shut-outs.  Lee and Martinez were not with us the whole year so some stats are hard to compare, but if you boil it down to ERA alone, Happ has been the most dependable.

All that is left now is for the fans to stay awake long enough to see if Happ can lead the team to a win.  Here are a few suggestions on how to stay up until wee hours of the morning:

·        No-Doze

·        SUGAR – sour-patch kids are great for this.  You will be bouncing off the walls in no time.

·        Smack your neighbor every time a Phillies batter strikes out -  you will probably get hit back, keeping you alert.

·        Scream “Bulls…t!” really loud every time a TBS announcer gets something wrong.  Of course, this may happen a lot, so be careful you do not lose your voice.

·        Run around your living room in circles while chewing gum and rubbing your belly…send me video ;o)  I am trying to stay awake too.

·        Ice cubes in odd places…use your imagination.

·        Every time an umpire blows a call, write an angry letter to Bug Selig.  While bomb threats are probably not appropriate, do feel free to use your favorite cuss words.  And keep a stack of paper on hand…the letters may start to pile up.

·        When the announcers mention Manny Ramirez (which should happen approximately 5.6 times per non-Dodgers broadcast), drink another RedBull.

·        And if none of that works, draw up a plan to sue Ryan Howard for no particular reason and teach your children a valuable lesson in extortion techniques.

Good luck to everyone out there in their quest to defy this ridiculous MLB scheduling!  Remember, we will all be suffering together :O)  Go Phillies!

Photo by Jenn

 

*Read more about the Phillies at my other home page, Phightin’ Phils Phorum in the My Team Rivals network*

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